On the plane to Italy. I feel like I'm ready to go to sleep, but not quite, so until I am ready to sleep, I'm going to post random as hell paragraphs regarding nothing special in particular.

So, how's it going where anybody lives? I hear in Montana, when it gets cold enough, a pot of boiled water will turn to freakin' snow dust. I know a kid who lives in Montana (Typical me, I know a lot of people anymore...) who used to stand out in the snow in his summer clothes with a frozen bottle of ketchup. He's kinda' weird. He dips everything in ketchup, and I know for a fact that he's been through psychotherapy at least ten times.

My book got all wet because some jack off spilled his soda on me in the airport! That son of a bitch... he nearly made me miss my plane, I had to change clothes real quick in the bathroom, and I noticed my plane had been called a couple minutes ago. So I was running to the gates, and security kept yelling at me to slow down, I tripped over some old lady with a whole tray of heartburn mixed with nausea and wilted liver, I believe they call that Chili Verde with Tacos and Spicy Chicken Burritos in some states, and when I finally got to the plane, my seat was taken by some idiot punk rapper whatever who was talking smack at the flight attendant. So, I got the seat right behind him, directly next to none other than, of all people, Max. His family was also shipping out to Italy.

So, apparently, it's going to be a bit rainy in Italy. Or that's what Max said. But I don't trust Max anymore, he confuses me too damn much. Rainy in Italy? Right, just like it was snowing in Alaska? Get real...

Oh wait, it's almost always snowing in Alaska...

Whoops.

Leif won't stop emailing me about how his girlfriend, Mary, is always complaining about this that and the othe-

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Sorry, dozed off there.